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Contents 

1. When the Child is First Looked After
2. Second Looked After Review
3. Court Decision that the Child Should be Placed for Adoption
4. When Potential Adopters are Identified
5. Following Placement with Prospective Adopters
6. Who Does Life Story Work?
7. What is a Life Story Book?
8. Who Should Compile the Life Story Book?
9. What Materials are Needed?
10. What Goes Into the Life Story Book?
11. Foster Carers/Residential Staff
12. Using the Life Story Book

1. When the Child is First Looked After

Direct work with children must begin at the point a child is Looked After.  Children must be given an explanation that is:

• truthful, yet compassionate
• at the child’s level of understanding
• removes blame from the child for their separation from their birth family
• agreed and consistently used by those involved in the child’s care

From the beginning, carers and social workers are ‘keepers of the child’s memory’ where children are separated from their birth family.  Those caring/responsible for the child must:

• retain mementos of the child
• collect photographs of the child and any outings/activities
• keep a record of events in the child’s life
• record any funny/touching stories of the child so that the child has stories to tell in the future

At the child's first Looked After Review (which is held one month after the child becomes Looked After), the Independent Reviewing Officer will establish that:

• the child has received an appropriate explanation for why he or she is Looked After
• all those involved in his/her care are giving the same explanation
• memories/photographs etc. are being kept and added to the child’s Life Story Book/Memory Box

2. Second Looked After Review

At this Review, consideration must be given to the permanence needs of the child and a Permanence Plan agreed. 

N.B. The life story book should be given to the child and prospective adopters in stages: at the latest by the second statutory review of the child's placement with the prospective adopters; and the completed life story book at the latest within ten working days of the adoption ceremony.

For children, this represents a time of confusion and uncertainty – a period where a child is in emotional ‘limbo’:

• there may be active reunification in process; or
• if reunification has ceased, there may still be a high level of contact for the child with the birth family, which is being maintained while awaiting the outcome of Court proceedings.

Direct work must continue with these children.  It is important to use this time as well as possible. The workers involved should:

• continue with consistent explanations to the child about why he or she is not living with the birth family. Children need the explanation that the judge/magistrates will decide what should happen and whether they return to their birth family.
• emphasise the importance of being kept safe.
• acknowledge that the child may be feeling sad - sadness must never be suppressed

3. Court Decision that the Child Should be Placed for Adoption

Where the Court supports the local authority plan for adoption, the child should be helped to understand what the decision means.

At the point where adoption is introduced to the child they should be given copies of the ‘Children’s Guide to Adoption’ appropriate to the child’s age (either under or over 5 years).

The dilemma when explaining about a child not returning to their birth family is the child’s concern about what will happen to them. The child may have an initial sense of relief, without questioning the future. They may assume they are remaining with their foster carer.  This may not be said directly, but be evident in the child asking questions about the future in an indirect manner.

A child who has an understanding of his or her position should be kept informed in an age appropriate way. The child needs to know that we are looking for a new family for them.  The dilemma is that for some children, particularly with older children, the time finding an adoptive family is unpredictable.  If the wait is very long (or unsuccessful) the effect on the child can be a feeling of being unwanted.

Life Story work must continue throughout this time.  It is the point at which the early part of the child’s history should be incorporated into a visual history for the child - in a Life Story Book/Memory Box.

At this stage there should be a plan of how the child will be prepared for a new family.  This part of the work could begin if the indications are that an adoptive family is close to being identified.

4. When Potential Adopters are Identified

At this stage, there must be clear plans about how the intense last stage of preparation will be done.

The timing of the process must be child-led.  If the child needs longer for the direct work to be completed, then the start of the introductions should be delayed.  Here, there is a delicate balance between the timing for the child and the counter-productive effect of keeping identified adopters waiting (particularly if they have older children).

5. Following Placement with Prospective Adopters

The direct work with children should continue in tandem with the prospective adoptive parent(s).

This is again a delicate balance to manage.  The child needs to be able to convey any difficulties/concerns, while the social worker needs to weigh up:

• the child’s healthy grief at the loss of their foster carers and birth family.  For some children, the realisation of their loss/final separation only comes when they are actually placed for adoption.
• that adoptive placements sometimes have difficult beginnings because the child re-cycles their early trauma in the placement (often through challenging behaviour but sometimes reactions not seen before).
• that difficult beginnings can be because the adopters react to the major shock and adjustment they have to make to adoptive parenthood.  This does not mean that ultimately the placement may not be successful.
• that some adoptive mothers have the equivalent of a ‘post natal’ depression, which they need help and understanding to work through.  Social workers need to monitor the effect of this on the child and be reassured that the adoptive father (or close relative) is able to provide what (temporarily) may be lacking in the adoptive mother.

It is important that in the work with a child following placement the child’s social worker is clear about her/his priority and aware that it is possible to collude with the adopters who might be having a very challenging time.  It is the adopter’s social worker who has the primary responsibility for supporting and helping the prospective adopters.

6. Who Does Life Story Work?

It is the prime responsibility of the child’s social worker to undertake the life story work with the child.  However it may be appropriate in some cases to delegate the work to another skilled worker who is well known to the child.  If life story work is undertaken by another worker this should be closely supervised by the child’s social worker or team manager to monitor its suitability.

It is not the responsibility of the child’s foster carer to undertake this work, as they do not have access to, or responsibility for, the child’s history before placement with them.  However, foster carer’s contribution to, and support of the process is essential.  Many foster carers provide the child with their own visual record of the time spent with them.

7. What is a Life Story Book?

Making a Life Story Book is more than creating a photograph album with identifying sentences giving dates, places and names. It is an account of a child’s life in words, pictures and documents, and an opportunity to explore emotions through play, conversation and counselling.

A Life Story Book should:

• Keep as full a chronological record as possible of a child’s life
• Integrate the past into the future so that childhood makes sense
• Provide a basis on which a continuing Life Story can be added to
• Be something the child can return to when he/she needs to deal with old feelings and clarify and/or accept the past
• Increase a child’s sense of self and self-worth
• Provide a structure for talking to children about painful issues

8. Who Should Compile the Life Story Book?

The process should be initiated, driven and co-ordinated by the child's social worker and carried out in co-ordination with the child, the carer(s), parents, relatives, friends etc.

Time and care should be given to:

• Planning carefully how to undertake the work
• Reading the information about the child carefully and thoroughly
• Collating the information in chronological order
• Noting reasons for decisions
• Noting gaps in the records and attempting to fill them
• Counselling children, parents, friends, relatives and carers etc., as necessary

9. What Materials are Needed?

Presentation is very important in terms of validating the importance of the Life story and motivating the child to want to read it and show it to others.

• Use a loose leaf folder
• Always work on clean paper
• Drawings and photos should be mounted
• Use neat headings
• If the child is unable/reluctant to write themselves, let them dictate what they want to say
• Use good quality copies/photocopies of treasured photos, documents etc. and not the original
• Get a balance of words and pictures
• A responsible adult should keep hold of the book until it is finished
• Keep a copy of it

10. What goes Into the Life Story Book?

• Family tree – back three generations if possible
• Photos of maternity hospital (and, for younger children, a clock showing the time)
• Weight, length, head circumference at birth
• Birth certificate, if possible
• Any items from the hospital (e.g. identity tag)
• Dates of first smile, sounds, words, tooth, steps etc.
• Photos of parents
• Photos and maps of places where the child lived
• Photos of relatives
• Photos of friends
• A truthful life history – including abuse, neglect etc. – that is age appropriate to the child. More detail can be added later as the child needs to know.
• Parents’ stories
• Details of siblings
• The child’s views and memories
• Photos of workers and their roles
• Story of the court process
• Photos of carers
• Story of family finding
• Details of ceremonies (e.g. baptism)
• Anecdotes
• Favourite foods, likes and dislikes

It is important to ensure that where information about other people is included, their permission is obtained and that no details which should remain confidential are included in the Life Story Book. This would include details of the adoptive placements of any siblings of the child in question.

11. Foster Carers/Residential staff

Foster families and residential staff should be encouraged to record the story of the child’s stay with them as fully as possible, including:

• Descriptions of what the child was like when they arrived, what they liked and disliked
• Details of development (e.g. learning to ride a bike)
• Their own special memories of the child
• Birthdays, Christmases and other family celebrations/outings/holidays etc. – photos, favourite places etc.
• Details and photos of foster family (including extended family), home, pets etc., who they got on with and who they didn’t
• If appropriate, times when they had arguments, sulks etc.
• Special rituals the child liked
• Souvenirs of school – photos, certificates, reports, photos of and stories from teachers
• Contact visits
• Illnesses
• Photos of birth family with foster family
• Crafts/pictures completed in the foster home/school/playgroup
• Anecdotes

12. Using the Life Story Book

Children need truthful and honest explanations that they can understand – that means using language they know.

It is important that:

• Questions are answered as honestly as possible
• Adults admit when they don’t know the answer and offer to try and find out (rather than making something up)
• Children are helped to accept that not everything can be explained or understood
• Information is given sensitively and honestly – protection and evasion leads to confusion and fear
• Adults help children to realise which feelings are healthy and acceptable by discussing their own feelings frankly. If feelings are ignored, children get the message that to express them is wrong – bottling them up can lead to negative behaviour like aggression or withdrawal
• Adults never pretend abusive/bad relationships didn’t exist

End